Have you ever been in a room or a meeting where one person has made a positive or negative difference to the whole group? Are you a reflection of the negative people around you or can you be a positive leader and encourage others to be the very best they can be. As a fitness leader and life coach I love to suggest simple strategies to;
 
 be the person who creates the positive RIPPLE EFFECT
 know when to deflect negative RIPPLE EFFECTS

 

Let me share the acronym RIPPLE

 

R = Respond or React
I  =  Initiate
P = Posture
P = Power of Choice
L = Learn to become your own observer 
E = Empower

R = Respond or React
Q: What happens when you – “find yourself being criticised in an over reactive or inappropriate discussion”. 

A:  PRACTISE PCR;

• Pause
• Calm and
• then Respond.

Let me expand just a little; responding in a negative like manner to a confrontation can have a negative ‘ripple effect’ over the situation and is often unproductive. Is it possible for you to identify the difference between ‘respond and react’? The ‘mindful’ group in WA concluded that ‘responding’ usually involved, stopping or using paraphrasing techniques before answering, whereas ‘reacting’ was answering immediately with emotion!

What do you think?

PCR is a skill that when practised over and over again will produce a more acceptable ‘outcome’ to the ‘conversation’. Try it you may be pleasantly surprised. 

I – Initiate
If you are annoyed and / or disgruntled with the way things happen at work, home or in your personal behaviour initiate a different action plan to create change and see it through.  Phrases such as ‘if nothing changes – nothing changes’ ring true here.  

 

Many of my personal training clients want to loose a ‘few kilos’.  When I explain the simple formula and together we organise a goal chart they ‘get it’.  People have to know what it is they want, how they are going to achieve it and then INITATE a change that suits their lifestyle.

 

Another example is the life-coaching clients who tell stories of being dissatisfied at work. I ask them to draw a diagram of what it looks like – with key emotive words. After ‘show and tell’ they are guided to draw ‘the dream picture’.  Together we can make simple, simple action steps to initiate a change.  On most occasions, people will see that only a few things need tweaking and the desired outcome is within their reach.  Try this with a close friend or family member and talk through the process.  It will make your vision clearer. 

 

The changes won’t happen overnight – but initiating action and concise COMMMUNICATION (even to yourself) will result in change. 

P – Posture
According to recent studies posture is a significant indicator of psychological and physiological effects in an individual.  One study examined how posture influenced self-esteem and mood, and another discovered that hormone levels of testosterone and cortisol and the release of endorphins alter in a specific posture. 

 

Have you ever watched the antics of animals as they change their ‘posture’?  Their non-verbal displays demonstrate power and dominance;

 Cat stretching
 Chimpanzee striking its chest
 Proud peacock fanning his tail feathers

 

Humans also display emotion through non-verbal actions;
 A nodding head of ‘yes’ from the listener will persuade the person speaking to expand the conversation
 Changing a breathing pattern can also shift a mood
 Making a fist – a gesture of power

 

So, the next time you attend a team meeting and want to be recognised for a new task sit up straight and be counted! 

 

Simple,  I am sure you’ll agree. 

P  -  Power of choice
As previously mentioned, you do have a choice as to how to respond to discussion and or situations. Self-efficacy is the belief that you can influence your own thoughts and behaviour to maintain personal well-being. 

 

So do you believe YOU have a choice?

 

Do you set challenging goals and maintain strong commitment? 

If you do experience a setback or what you consider a ‘failure’, work through it and ask yourself:

 How long did it take me to get ‘out of the rip’?
 Who were the people who threw the life buoy?
 Was I able to ‘swim’ to safety on my own?
 Do I now look for ‘calmer’ water or will I return to the same turbulence?

 

L - Learn to become your own observer
“It is much more difficult to judge oneself than to judge others” - Antoine de Saint – Exupery, Little Prince

Whilst this is a powerful quote, the focus should not result in ‘putting yourself down’.  Affirmations create positive people, personal ‘put downs’ destroy the real person.  Balance the scales and practise to observe without criticising yourself and observe without seeing gaps. 

 

PS: Let me suggest fun and effective times to practise affirmations and observation;

• Waiting at a red light,
• In the line of the supermarket, or
• waiting on while on hold.

 

Dance with life rather than wrestle with it!

 

What does this word mean to you?

– Do we empower ourselves, or do we allow people to POWER over us with conversations or actions that indicate:

 ‘It’s for ‘your own good’
 ‘I’m in charge’
 ‘My way is best’
 ‘I’m older, have more experience than you’

 

The next time you are asked to do something you are not completely comfortable with, - don’t answer straight away; say

 ‘let me think about it”
 ‘can I get back to you about this (give them a time)’
 ‘I have to take care of something right now, I’ll call you back and let YOU know’

 

This will allow time to evaluate the situation and decide if it is something you really want to be involved in.  The positive Ripple Effect in this case is – ‘empower yourself and feel that you have contributed to the decision’.

 

Shakespeare wrote ‘What’s past is prologue’ – whether your past has been good or bad, you haven’t a hope of changing it.  The hope lies in creating new positive RIPPLE EFFECTS in the future.  

 

Jennifer Schembri-Portelli affectionately known as JSP is a motivational speaker and director of WETS a training company that specialises in water based fitness and inclusive aquatics.  Having ‘walked the path’ in both personal and professional life, JSP offers images and personal anecdotes that are brimming with thought provoking strategies to find the I’m Possible out of the impossible! Contact info@wets.com.au to have JSP a skilled and enthusiastic presenter, entertain and educate staff and facility members.